IWRATS - I think you will find a very very detailed Cludgie scene (outside jakes as Dublin 1904 describes it) in James Joyce's Ulysses.
Leopold Bloom the hero is doing the toilet (Oooh, my wife hates the use of this term)
The final line in the very long description from memory is
"It did not move nor touch him but was something quick and neat, life might be so".
I once emptied the entire Martello Tower audience reciting this chapter. Schoolboyo error as the punchline is good but best to just say all what I have just mentioned quickly then cut to the last para.
My recitation of Joyce has benefited from this learning over the years and I was latterly (well 2004) a success in various boozers by skipping huge chunks and just doing the funny bits.
Also the novel True Grit is rendered verbatim in the Coen Bros. film. Pretty much all the wiki quotes are also from the novel by Charles Portis. It is a great book with a real heroine. The narrator is not keen on The James or YOunger outlaws at all. I also love the COen Bros movie and the original is not too bad.