A man’s a man for a' that (S---)
[ Or a true story that happened on a river patrol last year, read in the style of Tam O' Shanter, with apologies to Rabbie ].
"An doon the Water o’ Leith I speed,
Wi ma moontain bike, new helmet oan ma' heid,
The water lapit aye sae neat,
A fine day, sae complete.
Bit noo a twig caught in ma chain,
I hae tae stop, it is a pain,
The bloomin chain comes aff,
Now that is awfae, awfae rough.
I turn the bike upside doon,
Tae try an fix the metter soon,
But much worse is still tae come,
I smell ma finger it has a hum.
Aye oan my handlebar is doggie pooh,
Now that aint whit I want the noo,
Its on my glove, then on my hand,
This is not just what I planned.
So here’s a warning tae ye all,
When if you cycle or should fall.
Just watch were you put your mits,
As you too could end up in the [doggie ] s--ts!"
Anonymouse