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OT: tips for creative poems, haikus etc

(13 posts)
  • Started 6 years ago by SRD
  • Latest reply from gembo
  • This topic is resolved

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  1. SRD
    Moderator

    You guys are good at this sort of thing...

    My boss is stepping down and we have developed a 'tradition' of celebrating senior people with clever gifts, rather than flowers, money or trinkets. it's lovely really, but being invited to write a limerick about your boss brings out the worst in us all.

    So, suggestions for songs/hymns/poems that could easily be adapted to mention someone with a 3 syllable name? or tips for non-rude limericks of haikus?

    All and any help appreciated....

    Posted 6 years ago #
  2. gembo
    Member

    There was a young man from Japan
    Whose limericks didn't quite scan
    When asked why
    He said because I
    Try to put as many words into the last line as I possibly can

    Posted 6 years ago #
  3. Greenroofer
    Member

    I had a colleague called Jilly who left recently, so I wrote her a limerick. It was difficult. I only realised later that in my effort to avoid the obvious rhyme (this was work, after all) I'd missed the unobvious equivalent of 'will he?', which would have worked rather well.

    My point with this is that limericks are particularly good if they are full of double entrendres, and deliver the risque rhymes your audience expect, but in an office-friendly way.

    The limerick packs laughs anatomical
    In a space that is quite economical.
    The good ones I've seen
    So seldom are clean,
    and the clean ones so seldom are comical.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  4. dessert rat
    Member

    what to buy for the person who has everything ?? Not sure this is a clever gift, but it is still making me laugh.

    [+] Embed the video | Video DownloadGet the Flash Video

    mine arrived this morning and has been assembled this evening.

    I may never get bored of it.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  5. acsimpson
    Member

    This terrible lim'rick's taboo
    Because it ends on line 2

    When the Beatles wrote the music for Yesterday they struggled to think of A 3 syllabled lyric. So your boss' name would fit into it nicely.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  6. I were right about that saddle
    Member

    In addition to the syllable pattern haikus have to have an oblique style, a seasonal reference and a melancholy tone.

    Would your colleague appreciate such a poem?

    PS In what way is this off topic?

    Posted 6 years ago #
  7. wingpig
    Member

    If you can't find any apposite rhymes for their three-syllable name, just go for a weird/patchy meter/rhyme scheme and read it out in a pompous, declamatory tone.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  8. SRD
    Moderator

    you guys are the best...but i'm not any closer to composing my bloody poem. why can't i just give her a jar of jam?

    Posted 6 years ago #
  9. wingpig
    Member

    Donate a year's worth of hedgehog?

    Posted 6 years ago #
  10. gembo
    Member

    Try the first stanza of bunyan's original lyric of To Be A Pilgrim

    Everyone can sing it, communal singing is good but for chrissakes keep it short. These poems and songs at leaving dos go on for fecking ages

    Say your boss is called MacDonald

    Replace A Pilgrim with Mac Donald

    To Be MacDonald

    This scans but is a bit blunt, however it is the best I can do.

    The words of the first verse are however most encouraging and not very religious.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  11. SRD
    Moderator

    I think gembo gets the jar of jam....

    Thanks for the inspiration.

    Academic colleagues will appreicate that it is possible (barely) to get references to the REF, NSS and sabbatical leave into a 17th century hymn, if you don't care too much about scansion and totally ignore rhyme.

    Posted 6 years ago #
  12. unhurt
    Member

    I think you have to share your writing when it's done!

    Also, I'm off to make another poetry topic...

    Posted 6 years ago #
  13. gembo
    Member

    Here is a poem

    Pearl Diver

    the oyster is his world

    Posted 6 years ago #

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