CityCyclingEdinburgh Forum » Infrastructure

ERC in cafes

(18 posts)

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  1. algo
    Member

    My local cafe is often a meeting place for the ERC on a Saturday lunchtime. In general I enjoy this as it brings life and business to the area. What's more the atmosphere is usually very nice and the people themselves very friendly - I was allowed to basically queue jump with my daughter by one very friendly and considerate person who presumably recognised the physiology of a hungry child.

    Unfortunately last Saturday I was told to keep my children quiet - we had gone out for lunch in a family café. There were maybe 40 of the group in and outside the café and naturally making some noise. There were 4 of us and my youngest was hungry and singing to herself. We were told this was irritating and could we get her to be quiet.

    I don't like appearing to moan and post unpleasant things, but this really upset me and my family and it was really tough to explain to the kids.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  2. davidsonsdave
    Member

    Newsflash: Children make noise shocker! My eldest sings to herself almost constantly. Whilst I will try to moderate the noise of my children as appropriate to the situation, they will never, ever be described as quiet. If people find that irritating, they are free to move to a different table or a different cafe.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  3. algo
    Member

    thanks @davidsondave! A most reassuring and empathetic reply.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  4. chdot
    Admin

    “We were told this was irritating and could we get her to be quiet.”

    Seems unlikely that was the ‘ERC group view’, but not really a good thing to have happened.

    I’m sure the bigger group was ‘well behaved’ but not silent.

    An ERC group fell out with one or other cafe up there some time ago. Can’t remember if it was for misrule or not buying enough!

    Unfortunately tou met a bunch of disparate people with a degree of common interests but obviously not under the control of an organisation they happen to be members of.

    Perhaps some ERC members here may mention your incident to others.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  5. algo
    Member

    thanks @chdot - indeed you are right. I deliberately prefaced my post with a generally positive account because from my perspective having my local businesses supported and my local neighbourhood busy with life can only be a good thing. I happen to also really like bikes of course :-)

    Certainly not an ERC group view, but I would like to think that most of the other members would be as surprised by this behaviour as I was, and potentially be in a position to prevent it.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  6. steveo
    Member

    Ha, I'd sick my youngest on any one who asked us to be quiet.
    I know they're irritating, I live with them but frankly tough!

    Posted 6 years ago #

  7. I were right about that saddle
    Member

    I'd ask for a little bit of empathy with those who aren't around kids much and so don't have the same resistance to the normal racket that happy children make. I like the babble of youngsters in a cafe normally, but in pubs I can be less enthusiastic. I can't imagine a bit of singing would be unwelcome. I'd probably have joined in.

    But parents who let their kids do that ear-piercing shrieking ...I do find that difficult sometimes.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  8. davidsonsdave
    Member

    Life flows to it's own tune and often doesn't meet the expectations we have in our head. If the person was irritated they should maybe ask themselves if it is reasonable to expect to go to a family cafe where there are no children, as children are noisy (except French children, who are always impossibly well behaved at mealtimes).

    Posted 6 years ago #

  9. algo
    Member

    @IWRATS - absolutely - it is important to have empathy in general. In this case I would point out that the place was incredibly noisy - in quieter environments I do tend to teach my kids consideration and will suggest to them that they should be quieter.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  10. Darkerside
    Member

    It would be a rare parent who consciously "lets their kids do that ear-piercing shrieking" thing. Possibly they're so exhausted they're picking their battles... :)

    Small children make noise. We were all once small children. Glass houses / stones.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  11. davidsonsdave
    Member

    "But parents who let their kids do that ear-piercing shrieking".

    If you know of a way of stopping them, write a book. We parents will all buy it and you will be rich!

    Posted 6 years ago #

  12. gembo
    Member

    We can all have bad days I guess? I mean the cyclist objecting to the child. The woman who sings whilst cycling along towpath has I think started recognising me? She certainly increases the volume when she clocks me maybe as I am smiling.

    I like kids. If I find them annoyoing I have other strategies. (Note I do not think i could ever find @algo's children annoying, they are so full of fun and smarts.

    Here is one such coping strategy given to me by the boss of Grays Ironmongers. He is trying to sell me a pyrex measuring jug in about 2001. He has seen me in the shop with the two tiny kids (the third not yet constructed). THis time I am on my own. I am not keen to pay the Grays price for a pyrex measuring jug. So I go with - Ah now, maybe you have a plastic (ie cheaper ) jug as I think my children might break the glass one. He says in very sarky but funny to me now tone - Yes I imagine YOUR children would break a glass one.

    Still got that plastic jug, 17 years later.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  13. algo
    Member

    @gembo - you are too kind. I can assure you my kids can be extremely annoying and devoid of smarts. However, I am very flattered by your description.

    You are right about bad days - this has to be considered. I was taken aback on account of the general noise level but I do realise different types of noise irritate different people. I don't much care for the coffee machine noise personally.

    @darkerside, for the purposes of playing devil's advocate - you are right we were all once small children. Equally, we were all once not parents. Some people aren't parents and would very much like to be - something I try to bear in mind when I'm not being a massive hypocrite and bombarding my e-friends and distant relatives with the latest nonsense from my children.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  14. I were right about that saddle
    Member

    If you know of a way of stopping them

    I was told to shut up and taken outside and battered if I didn't. I can't recommend it as a course of action.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  15. steveo
    Member

    I was told to shut up and taken outside and battered if I didn't

    just makes it worse, the irritating singing is replaced by ear splitting crying which we are genetically inclined to find stressful.

    I'm in the hate kids around when I'm deliberately attempting to be child free camp. However I'm far to polite to tell a stranger to quiet down.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  16. I were right about that saddle
    Member

    @steveo

    Quite.

    Posted 6 years ago #

  17. LaidBack
    Member

    Yeah... good modern children should stay quiet and create 'want lists / play games' on their iPad (!)
    Some people just don't understand the positives of children playing and singing. They are grumpy people.
    (Our own one did 'test' George Monbiot for a while once on the train from Arisaig! He did really well.)

    Posted 6 years ago #

  18. neddie
    Member

    I find it odd that ERC are happy to frequent a cafe that only offers “toast rack” wheel-bender bike parking.

    But then again, why would they care about utility cycling?

    Posted 6 years ago #

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